Mama’s 56th

November 30, 2010

A couple of weeks ago, we celebrated our mom’s 56th birthday. Almost everything was there… good food, few relatives to celebrate it with… everything, but the birthday celebrator herself.

And it just pains me to think… What if mama’s still here with us and everything’s fine? Probably I would have bought her a new phone as my gift. Maybe we would have  celebrated her day somewhere  else. Perhaps I would have treated her to a spa treatment. Surely I would have made that day a hundred notches more special for her, if only she were here.

Many people ask me if I’m okay already. I just give them a smile- more often a smirk. I tell them sometimes yes, sometimes not.

And I guess,  that is just how things will be forever. Because yes, we will not be able to completely move on. This, despite the good things that will come our way. Because we won’t be complete anymore. And we have to endure this pain forever.